Mixtape Mondays – Spidey Damon is a Sexy Beast Edition – The Vampire Diaries

Thirsty Damon

Thirsty for some Damon-y goodness to get you through the hiatus? Aren't we all!

My first character-centric mixtape about Damon from the Vampire Diaries was going to be an in-depth assessment of his motivations, arc and personality quirks.

But I had a conversation with a friend that changed everything.

I was trying to get this friend hooked on The Vampire Diaries, which she was resisting because she hates Twilight, by playing the Hot Somerhalder card.

 She asked me to give a run-down of the character to convince her to watch and my reply went like this:

 “Well, see, Damon was in love with a crazy vampire bitch named Katherine who was in a ménage a three with him and his brother Stefan while they were still human and then he died with her vamp blood in his system as did Stefan at the gun-toting hands of their crazy vamp-hating father and Damon promised Stefan a life of misery because Stefan forced him to complete the final step of turning into a vamp against his will cos he thought Katherine was dead and undead life would meaning nothing without her, so after that he pretty much followed Stefan around the world being an obligatory psychotic jackass without a real sense of purpose…”

sexy damon feeding

*breath*

Thanks KJewls for bringing this hot way of showing breaths to my attention

 “But then he thought Katherine was actually undead alive but trapped in a magically sealed tomb in Mystic Falls so he whipped up a diabolical dot dot dot plan to free her at exactly the same time that Stefan moved back to Mystic Falls because he had fallen in love from afar with Katherine’s human doppelganger Elena, what a coinki-dink amiright, and as part of this plan Damon had to wait for a celestial event AKA a comet to pass overhead and find an ugly ass witch’s crystal to set in motion the steps required to free Katherine, so passed the time by eating football coaches and dancing around with his soon-to-be-victims in their underwear and it was AWESOME, only when he finally managed to open the tomb it turned out Katherine wasn’t in there and had actually been having a grand old time stalking Stefan over the centuries at Bon Jovi concerts rather than checking up on him…”

sexy damon feeding

*breath*

“And then Damon was a little emo and sought solace in college coeds and alcohol in scenes that made a teetotaller like me thirsty for a good scotch, and all of a sudden the slow burning attraction he had started developing with Elena which was different to the insta-love of Stefan and Elena that I have a soft spot for but can poke holes in began to spill over in scenes that made my inner fangirl squee and her partake in crazy activities like making mixtapes dedicated to the epicness of their relationship, but just as it got interesting Katherine decided to come back and mess with Damon’s head so much a series of unfortunate events occurred that concluded in him snapping Elena’s brother’s Jeremy’s suddenly smoking hot neck but Jeremy was wearing a magical ring so he came back to life so it was all good and he had tried to commit vampirecide earlier that day anyway…”

sexy damon feeding
*breath*

“But ultimately Damon had hit rock bottom and almost fully destroyed his friendship with Elena, though, C’MON, the series is marketed as a vamp-human-vamp triangle so Delena is SO ON in the future and sexytimes are inevitable, however for the moment Damon is now going on an awesome one step forward, two steps back redemption arc that involves him doing things like provoking the neighbourhood werewolf unnecessarily and killing him but also risking everything to protect Elena, who hasn’t quite forgiven him, and declaring his love for her in the single most fangirl-worthy scene since Logan planted a big one on Veronica’s lips, and hey, Damon is kinda a vampire Logan when you think about it, but the point is that Damon is AWESOME and you need to watch.”

My friend: “So let me get this straight: your latest major TV Boyfriend is a murdering sociopath who snapped the neck of the brother of the girl he is meant to be in love with? Umm, what is an ethical, nice, kind, caring girl like you doing lusting after him?”

Me: “Well, I have eyes!”

And so this conversation is the reason why this mixtape is a gratuitous hotness tribute to the sexy beast that is Damon – I want to prove to her once and for all that NOTHING CAN MAKE YOU RESIST THE PRETTY once you are hooked.

A proper plot-driven mixtape will follow at some point in the future, but here is a mixtape that is essentially unabashed worship of the better, hotter, superior option that is Damon Salvatore.

Mixtape Track #1 – Eat You Up – BoA

Lyrics: 

When I first saw you I knew nothing’s like it used to be
Boy you have got to be the finest thing in history
The way I feel inside is just so hard to understand
You feed my appetite in ways I can’t explain

I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
(Woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Woah)
So yum yum
(Woah)
Can’t get enough
(Woah oh oh)
I think I’m in love

If you move any closer boy there is no guarantee
What I will do to you I fear it and it’s scaring me
Like I’ve become some kind of demon in the night
You look so tasty I could eat you up alive

I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
(Woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Woah)
So yum yum
(Woah)
Can’t get enough
(Woah oh oh)
I think I’m in love

I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
(Woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Woah)
So yum yum
(Woah)
Can’t get enough
(Woah oh oh)
I think I’m in love

Can’t stop thinking ’bout the things I wanna do to you
If you move any closer you’d be asking for it too
I want your love
I need your touch
So much I think I’m in love

(oooh woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Your love, your love~)
(Woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Woah)
So yum yum
(Woah)
Can’t get enough
(Woah oh oh)
I think I’m in love

I wanna take you to my room
(I’ll eat you up)
Wanna take you to my room
(I’ll eat you up)

(Woah)
I’ll eat you up
(Woah)
So yum yum
(Woah)
Can’t get enough
(Woah oh oh)
I think I’m in love

(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)
(I’ll eat you up)

Damon connection:

Roughly translated, this song can be read as OM NOM NOM DAMON IS A SEXY BEAST NOM.

Care to disagree?

sexy irresistible wrecked damon

Source

Didn’t think so!

Line that particularly works for me:

Like I’ve become some kind of demon in the night

Prophetic! It is almost like the singer knew I would be writing a mixtape tribute for a VAMPIRE AKA DEMON character. Well played, BoA. Well played, indeed.

Line that doesn’t work:

The way I feel inside is just so hard to understand

Um, the way I feel inside is my lady bits rejoicing at the sight of this fine male specimen. It’s simple, really 😉

Oh, by the way, do watch the film clip. BoA is almost as good a dancer as our boy Damon!

Mixtape Track #2 – Cherry Lips (Go Baby Go!) – Garbage

 

Lyrics:

She gave you everything she had
But she was young and dumb
She’d just turned twenty-one
She didn’t care to hang around
So when the shit came down
Why she was nowhere to be found
This life can turn a good girl bad
She was the sweetest thing
That you had ever seen

You’re such a delicate boy
In the hysterical realm
Of an emotional landslide
In physical terms

With your cherry lips and golden curls
You could make grown men gasp
When you’d go walking past them
In your hot pants and high heels
They could not believe
That such a body was for real
It seemed like rainbows would appear
Whenever you came near the clouds would disappear
Because you looked just like a girl
Your baby blues would flash
And suddenly a spell was cast

You hold a candle in your heart
You shine the light on hidden parts
You make the whole world wanna dance
You bought yourself a second chance

Go Baby Go Go
We’re right behind you
Go baby Go Go
Yeah we’re looking at you
Go baby Go GO
Aw we’re right behind you
Go Baby
Go Baby
Yeah we’re looking at you
Go

Damon connection:

OK, so yes, this song is actually about the hotness of a transvestite. But hear me out! It works for Damon for a couple of reasons.

One, these lyrics:

Your baby blues would flash
And suddenly a spell was cast

Damon's baby blues

To paraphrase Angela Chase, Damon’s baby blue eyes are so beautiful to look at it, it hurts. Even if Damon didn’t possess the powers of vampiric compulsion, his eyes have this awesome lazy feline sexiness and capacity to do the craziest Things with a capital T, that they would cast a spell on me anyway.

Two:

Damon’s activities regularly make me wanna sing out the anthemic refrain of the song LOUD. For example:

Go

Damon dancing go one

Baby

Damon dancing baby

Go!

Damon dancing go two

Mixtape Track #3 – All Around Me – Savage Garden

Lyrics:

Well you know every time
I look at that expression printed on the page
I think I hear you
Whispering the magic and the compliments I need so badly
So baby come on, oh, so baby come on
Now I’ve been running circles around the notion
That you’ll find me baby
One day maybe
But all the psychic powers of suggestion
I’ve been sending your way
So can’t you hear me say?

I want your arms all around me
I want your face, yeah, all around me
I want your perfume all around me
I like the way you move and do the funky groove

All around me I want you, all around me I need you
I want your arms all around me
I want your face, yeah, all around me
I want your perfume all around me
I like the way you move and do the funky groove

Like a cold chardonnay chilled for a day
Your smooth and crisp and on display
Like Cartier, Armani, like TAG, Gucci, Versace
In the middle of the night your a kiss so long
You’re the only good thing when all is wrong
You’re a magic time reversal clock
You’re the fries on the side with a cherry on top
You’re sleek, velvet, gold lame
Patent leather, enchante
You’re a legend, you’re a glamour queen
God I’m running out of words but you know what I mean

All around me I want you, all around me I need you
All around me I want you, all around me, so can’t you hear me say?
I want your arms all around me
I want your face, yeah, all around me
I want your perfume all around me
I like the way you move and do the funky groove

I want your arms all around me
I want your face, yeah, all around me
I want your perfume all around me
I like the way you move and do the funky groove

So slide into your Jaguar, or Porsche baby, there you are
Well chop chop darling, au revoir
Pick your things up, your a star
Oh yes, yes you are darling
Thats right. Thats right now.

Damon connection:

Now, lest this mixtape make me appear like I swim only in the shallow end of the pool, I’ll let you in on a secret… I judge my TV Boyfriends by their personalities too. Shocking, I know! As those who know me well are aware, my two favourite types of TVB personalities are “snarky, jerky bad boy” and “charismatic geek”.

The rap in this song (which I bolded) perfectly embodies the character of Damon, who falls firmly in the first camp. It is sung with such irreverent charm that it practically channels the spirit of the character and his appeal, despite his sociopathic tendencies.

many different faces of Damon

Who could resist this charm machine?

Source

Now, Damon would not approve of John Varvados being left off the list of designers in the rap, but let’s face it, we would prefer him to be shirtless anyway, so designers, smesigners!

The “glamour queen” reference and the connotations of this term at first glance stretches the Damon comparison a little, but when I think of the word “glamour” now I think of vamps compelling people thanks to True Blood and the Sookie Stackhouse novels, so I think it is quite fitting actually!

Also, I think that “You’re a magic, time reversal clock” is pretty apt given Damon’s vampirehood prevent him from every aging, plus up until recently he was pretty much stuck in the past due to his obsession with Katherine.

Mixtape Track #4 – I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred

Lyrics:

I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love
Love’s going to leave me

I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
And I’m too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I’m too sexy for your party, too sexy for your party
No way I’m disco dancing

I’m a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
I do my little turn on the catwalk

I’m too sexy for my car, too sexy for my car
Too sexy by far
And I’m too sexy for my hat
Too sexy for my hat, what d’you think about that

I’m a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, on the catwalk, yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk

I’m too sexy for my, too sexy for my, too sexy for my

‘Cause I’m a model, you know what I mean
And I do my little turn on the catwalk
Yeah, on the catwalk, yeah, on the catwalk, yeah
I shake my little touche on the catwalk

I’m too sexy for my cat, too sexy for my cat
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat
I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love
Love’s going to leave me

And I’m too sexy for this song

Damon connection:

Ian Somerhalder has done some modelling work in his time and even became a GQMF, so this tongue-in-cheek song about a model’s high opinion of himself is a nice little satire of his almost inhuman hotness.

But one line in particular stands out:

I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt

As all regular TVD watchers will know, in the most recent episode we were finally thrown a shirtless Salvatore crumb after nine episodes of NARY A SHIRTLESS SALVATORE IN SIGHT.

Shirtless Salvatore crumb

This = Shirtless Salvatore crumb. I've heard of quality over quantity, but two seconds of Naked Damon who is pretty covered up for that matter does not a happy fangirl make!

The producers have tested the breaking point of fangirls and should take this little message of the song to heart.

damon putting shirt back on

Damon putting a shirt back ON is not something we need to see, Julie and Kev.

Mixtape Track #5 – Hypnotic – Bomfunk MC’s & Elena Mady

Lyrics:

Hypnotic

You get your kick off
With little bit a’ hip hop
We rock the rooftop
The super sounds that you love
Zap, we back
And pappa’s got a brand new bag
Full of tricks, beat the kicks
Rockin’ and shockin’ the hops the hips
The funky chicks
We change the riffs
Fashion, passion, misfits
Stand up proud, have no doubt,
Come on, shout it out!
I’m the real deal when I come around,
I freak you out, coming over ground

Ooh, how you make me feel
Hypnotic, hypnotic
Ooh, cast a spell on me,
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)

You get your kick off
With little bit a’ hip hop
We rock the rooftop
The super sounds that you love

I’m so blinded by the dazzling lights
I’m only guided by rhythms of the night
Hot bodies all around
Make me think i’ve found, the beat
And a heart synchronized with mine

Ooh, how you make me feel
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)
Ooh, cast a spell on me,
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)

You get your kick off
With little bit a hip hop
We rock the rooftop
The super sounds that you love
You get your kick off
With little bit a hip hop
We rock the rooftop
The super sounds that you love

Bound, to break
The boundaries, the estimate
The fool’s roots
We overtake, we renegades stormin’ the place
Breakin’ and shakin’ and chasing the bass
Bringin’ it up on the front page
We’re back, on time that is the sound
Come on, freak, sing it out
I’m the real deal when i come around
I freak you out, comin’ over ground

Ooh, how you make me feel
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)
Ooh, cast a spell on me,
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)

Thrills, the chills, dominate the sex appeal,
Surreal, with the funk I feel, rebellious rockers acting ill.
Escapades and matinee’s the breaks from the rat race,
The sound, the scratch, electroclash, the revelation, kickin’ ya ass!!
The new phenomenon takin’ over town,
Feel the force, coming over ground.

I feel so electric, it really blows my mind
The kind of electric, I just take off and fly
Hot bodies all around
Make me think i’ve found, the beat
And a heart synchronized with mine

Ooh, how you make me feel
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)
Ooh, cast a spell on me,
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)

Ooh, how you make me feel
Hypnotic, hypnotic
Ooh, cast a spell on me,
Hypnotic (get ready!), hypnotic (jump on it!)
x2

Damon connection:

Bound, to break
The boundaries, the estimate
The fool’s roots

I’d like to think of this song as a call to action for all girls (and guys, for that matter) resisting the charms of Mr Damon Salvatore, which are bound to “break” you down eventually.

The new phenomenon takin’ over town,
Feel the force, coming over ground

Mystic Falls will never be the same again, and neither will we – so just give in to the inevitable and “jump on it”!

Well, there you have it! I’m working on a more serious Damon tribute, but think the research for this one (i.e. combing Vampire Diaries Tumblrs for sexy picspam) would be pretty hard to top in the fun stakes.

Are there any songs that you remind you of Damon?

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About Spidey Sense

Pop culture junkie, fangirl, arts and theatre lover, and The Vampire Diaries, True Blood and The Walking Dead obsessive. View all posts by Spidey Sense

10 responses to “Mixtape Mondays – Spidey Damon is a Sexy Beast Edition – The Vampire Diaries

  • kjewls

    Another Tour De Force, Cherie! This made my morning!

    Everything about this post was perfect — your explanation to your friend about why Damon is so awesome, The “Breaths,” 😉 the AWESOME screencaps and picspam –all showing Damon at his most intoxicatingly sexy (kind of wishing you didn’t include that picture of him with Man Stealer Rose though . . . grr!)

    I couldn’t help but giggle that you used Right Said Fred’s song as part of Damon’s mixtape. How very appropriate! Ahhh, I’m Too Sexy . . . everything about that song is so wrong, yet so right. And as much as everyone mocks the very unsexy Right Said Fred and his cheesy lyrics, I challenge them not to dance to the song, whenever its played at a club. It’s IMPOSSIBLE!

    As for songs that make me think of Damon, I shudder to admit this, but I’ve been listening to Pretty Reckless’ Make Me Wanna Die quite a bit lately. And the lyrics TOTALLY remind me of the Blood Brothers Episode.
    Picture this: It is 1864. Damon has willingly taken Katherine’s blood. He is prepared to spend eternity with the woman he loves more than life itself. Then, due to circumstances he cannot control, she is captured and presumed dead. Suddenly, eternal life doesn’t seem like such a good idea . . . The man who once wanted to live forever, now craves the true death. He has an important choice to make.

    Check out the lyrics here:
    http://www.elyrics.net/read/p/pretty-reckless-lyrics/make-me-wanna-die-lyrics.html

    Ughh . . . I can’t BELIEVE I’m quoting Taylor Momsen in a Damon post. *facepalm* 🙂

    • myspideysenseistingling

      *Dances like Damon at this awesomely nice, sweet and funny post

      It was just a matter of time that I found an excuse to insert the picture used for the “breaths” – if there was ever an expression to convince my friend of the extent of Ian’s Hot Somerhalderness, that is it!

      I knew the Rose inclusion would be controversial but it had to be done, as it further illustrates how truly inadequate that Shirtless Somderhalder crumb was. At least have Damon dancing half-naked with Stefan as they celebrate their burgeoning bromance this season or something! Instead we get Ian largely covered up with a Man Eater at his side. UGH! TVD producers, life yo game up, oh, lift your game up 😉

      “Make Me Wanna Die” is actually a perfect song for Damon, and don’t worry, cheese is obviously VERY welcome in these weekly mixtapes so you’re doing me a favour, and can write off quoting Taylor Momsen as your solemn fangirl duty.

      Next week: Stelena! Followed by… Jyler!

  • Jesse

    Wow… That’s exactly what I needed today! Just to let you know – I got up at 6, needed to go to college, it rained and the best thing is, it’s freeeeezing cold here.

    So I’m saying THANK GOD for the Hottie who’s name is Damon! And thank you for doing this post!

    I can understand your friend because at first I didn’t like it and didn’t want to watch it – I was in Australia when they started airing it in Germany and knew nothing about it. But when I came back my Mom just said that I needed to watch it… and now she’s got a little obsessiv sitting at home :))

    Anyway, getting out the “HotSomerhalder” card wasn’t really fair – but I think it def. worked to get her hooked on TVD didn’t it?

    “Umm, what is an ethical, nice, kind, caring girl like you doing lusting after him?”

    Me: “Well, I have eyes!”

    Great!! Nothing more to say about this.

    BTW, that pic of Ian staring at us (in “Cherry Lips(Go, baby, go)”) makes me blush everytime and seriously brings out the little fangirl giggling inside of me. His eyes are just too gorgeous to be real – and yet they are! And I love to see him dancing…

    You’re soo right! I missed the shortless Damon! You know that deep down in my heart, I’m shipping Stelena, but that doesn’t mean I would mind something sooo yummy! 😉

    Those are great songs you’ve chosen for Damon! Can’t wait to read more from you…

    And sorry that I was babbling that much
    Talk to you on twitter

    • myspideysenseistingling

      Yippee! Another Sister Obsessive! Welcome to the fold 🙂

      Your comment had me laughing the whole way through, especially the line about it not being fair using the Hot Somerhalder card. Yes, it is true, he could be part of a pile of sludge and would still make it interesting, but I had to knock her defenses down where she is weak!

      To be honest, the first five eps made me want to skewer my eyes out when I initially watched them (though now when I look back I feel nostalgia at the extreme cheesiness of things like the fog machine, crow etc), but the hotness of Damon and Stefan gave me the strength to pull through 😉 Then, that dancing scene between Damon and Vicki happened and I was HOOKED FOR LIFE.

      What was the moment that did it for you?

      BTW, the Stelena post is turning into the epic length of the Delena one. Looks like it will be another two parter Mixtape!

      • Jesse

        Okay…
        So I told you I wouldn’t comment again before the Stelena miytape is up, but your comment wouldn’t leave me alone! It kept running through my head, so I just needed to answer you!

        Thanks for your warm welcome! I’m obsessive for a while already, but didn’t have the chance to use the internet that much(that obviously changed… lol)so I just started out meeting other fans of TVD!

        I totally agree with you on that! It was Damon who caught my interest at first, but then I fell in love with Stelena…BTW, is your friend watching TVD now? Or could she resist the “OhSoHotSomerhalder” card??

        To be honest, I haven’t seen the first few eps! It wasn’t my fault tho. As I mentioned before I was in Australia so couldn’t watch it, and my Mom started recording it from ep 5 or 6… don’t really remember which one is was!

        And then… The scene with Damon and Vicky dancing was awesome!

        The moment that did it for me… That’s kind of a hard question! I think it after I saw “Haunted” that I was HOOKED (yes, of course; FOR LIFE!)! I liked the beginning…

        Elena: Is Stefan here?
        Damon: Yup
        Elena: Where is he?
        Damon: And good morning to you little miss… I’m on a mission…

        Soo great! And in the end when Elena confesses to Stefan that she can’t ignore her feelings for him??
        Awwwwww, that’s the ONE! This scene totally got me hooked!!

        Okay, so you notice how I can go on babbling about TVD forever?? And that’s me only short(you wouldn’t want me to get longer… ;))

        I’m back to waiting patiently for next monday and your Stelena post! At least I can see “Under Control” tomorrow night, when it airs in Germany!

        • myspideysenseistingling

          Oh, Little Miss “I’m On A Mission” was a FABULOUS moment, made all the more awesome by the evil pixie grin Damon makes as he passes Elena out of the doorway. It didn’t hurt that the direct sunlight made his eyes seem even more translucent blue than usual (yes, I am JUST as obsessed as you and notice little details like these that a lot of people would roll their eyes at :)).

          OhSoHotSomerhalder card. Love it! Yes, she now watches but wasn’t completely won over until the “Gorgeous, irrestible, wrecked” Damon moment.

          What I love about TVD is that all of the relationships are so well-developed that I even if I have shipper preferences I can enjoy most of the romances, or at least understand why they have sprung up. And that is why Stelena deserve a mixtape as epic as the Delena one 🙂

          And babble as long as you want! It is intelligent, smart, funny babble – and this blog is essentially one long babble anyway 😉

  • The Many Faces of The Vampire Diaries’ Damon Salvatore | TV Recappers Anonymous

    […] posts, courtesy of my blogging pal, Cherie.  Fellow TVD fans should be sure to check out her Damon Salvatore Mixtape, as well as her kickass post regarding the Sartorial Stylings of Stefan Salvatore (a term […]

  • In Defense Of Shirtless Salvatores « myspideysenseistingling

    […] My goodness, it’s almost like this Tumblr blogger read my Damon hotness mixtape! […]

  • Christina R

    Holy cow! What you’re friend said about is is SO ME! I’ve never been so attached and in love with a character like Damon before. But there’s just something about him. I love him and it’s freaking unreal. hahahaha. Damn, I’d kidnap him and do all sorts of things to him if I ever met him.

    • Spidey Sense

      Seriously, it would be awesome if us fangirls could blindfold Ian Somerhalder, take him to an awesome mansion and hold him at ransom until he danced to Enjoy The Silence for us, half naked. Because as you say, there is just something about him that is hard to deny. For me, his snarky one liners and way with words are totaly panty droppers, but let’s face it, that bod and those blue eyes don’t hurt either 😉

      I’ll admit that the Tyler character is the one I am most in love with, but I obviously have a deep soft spot for Damon too.

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