Disclaimer: I am a normal, well-adjusted fangirl. But I’ll be the first to admit that the torture porn in The Vampire Diaries makes me very happy indeed. Especially because it usually dovetails with torso porn.
Let’s take a step back.
What is torture porn?
Well, in horror films it is a subgenre that focuses on over interest in the vulnerability of the human body, usually through graphic violence.
On The Vampire Diaries, it usually involves a hot guy grunting and getting half-naked, hot and sweaty.
In short, it is a fangirl wet dream.
Let’s look at The Vampire Diaries torture porn hall of fame, shall we?
It would be blasphemous for me to start with anyone other than Bondage Stefan.
Regular Spidey readers know him and love him. Here are a couple more angles to appreciate him with.
Truly, I am forever in the debt of those tomb vampires who made the stupid decision to kidnap a Salvatore for revenge at being left behind to dessicate for 145 years.
Crying Wolf showed Stefan rolling around in pain after being shot by Brady and Tyler (naughty Tyler), and it made my Bondage-Stefan loving heart swell with pride.
Tyler was tortured by his own body when he first transformed into a wolf. And chains were involved in the process, so this gets the torture porn tick of approval.
Damon’s actual torture itself in Crying Wolf wasn’t really that sexy, but the eyef**king he shared with his saviour Elijah hella was.
You know the best part about torture?
The need to wash the dirt and grime off when it is all over.
I, for one, am hoping that the sacrifice ritual involves Damon, Stefan, Tyler, Jeremy, Alaric and yes, even Matt, in one massive torture porn scene.
It isn’t inconceivable. I mean, the way that judging by the sparks Elijah had with Damon last episode, he could be after some hot action and just add this element into the ritual for fun. Elijah is awesomesauce, so you never know.
Though, could you imagine if all of that hotness happened on screen at once?
The cosmos could realign, a tear in the time-space continuum could happen, time could start working in reverse, the world could spin off its very axis.
Maybe it is safer for humanity if they don’t all appear at once.
myspideysenseistingling 
February 14th, 2011 at 3:36 pm
Naked Damon Shower Picture . . . never . . . gets . . . old. 🙂
I definitely think the producers of TVD capitalize on the torture porn aesthetic, by making their torture scenes as breathtakingly gorgeous as possible. Did you notice how all three men’s bodies are completely hair free? Or how, though slightly sweaty, with a sexy sheen of dirt and grime sporadically sprinkled across their torsos, neither Stefan nor Tyler, have a single scratch on their perfect bodies? (Only Damon seems to be sporting a mildly gory Blood Collar, to complement his Highly Blinged Out metal one .. .)
I don’t recall Jeremy ever getting tortured (Neck Snap Incident notwithstanding), but Mason Lockwood definitely got his share of torture porn during his brief time on the show. I like your idea of all the boys on the show being stripped down and chained to a wall. Hey, maybe KLAUS could do it, so we would get the added bonus of throwing a half-naked Tortured Elijah into the mix. (Come on, you just know Daniel Gillies body just HAS to be smokin’.) 😉
February 15th, 2011 at 12:50 pm
Haha! I will find just about any excuse possible to include the Naked Damon Shower Picture between now and… the next time he takes off his shirt!
Forget the Vampire Diaries cast needing a gym on location. What I bet they have is a chest waxer employed full time to make sure the men are hair free, supple and ready to go at any given moment 😉 It really is amazing how dirt and grime can be strategically placed to enhance the sexiness of all of these men. Kind of like how Cement Eric in the True Blood season three finale was jawdroppingly hot.
In some ways, I would love Elijah to be the one to lead the mass torture porn scene, so that he could give each participant a white handkerchief at the end, like he gave Damon to stem the blood flow after stabbing him with that pencil. But then, I admit I am VERY curious to find out what body is hiding underneath the three piece suits he wears so damn well.
February 14th, 2011 at 8:50 pm
I’m not into torture porn, but as a little side comment: the “slaterwolf” actually did get his idea of torturing Damon from porn.
February 15th, 2011 at 12:45 pm
Ha! That is an excellent point about Slaterwolf!
I’m not into the real, honest-to-goodness torture porn… really intense human suffering isn’t my thing. But seeing men sweaty, exerted and pushed to the edge of their pain threshold in a CW show suits me just fine 😉
February 15th, 2011 at 4:28 pm
You lucky girl, I knew some guys, well it wasn’t porn, but thzey found the pain depicted in the videos they watched very funny. Sick……
However, seeing sweaty ripped man has something I agree ;), Although I prefer them not too ripped
February 16th, 2011 at 4:32 am
Yeah, real torture porn is pretty disgusting. Don’t get me wrong; I love blood and guts in the context of an overarching storyline, but when the focus is to show to what extremes a human body can be defiled… not so much. But hey, different strokes for different folks!
I love the bodies of all the Vampire Diaries guys. Ripped, but not overly so. It’s really too bad that you guys don’t live in Australia, because this is the body type of Australian Football League Players. So sport is actually interesting to watch over here from time to time.
February 16th, 2011 at 5:26 pm
Really? Maybe I should visit Australia one day. 🙂 Well actually I plan to come one day, albeit for another Australian icon.
February 17th, 2011 at 1:55 pm
Australia is awesome, not that I’m biased or anything 😉
February 16th, 2011 at 2:40 am
BONDAGE STEFAN!!!
That is all ;-0
February 17th, 2011 at 1:56 pm
I can never doubt the existence of a
Music SexGod, when a creature like Bondage Stefan exists in popular culture 😉