This week’s episode of the Vampire Diaries, The Sun Also Rises, will forever be known to me as The Naked Tyler Lockwood Show, and for that reason it’ll always hold a special place in my ovaries.
Be warned, smutty innuendo aplenty will feature in this recap. Dangle Naked!Tyler in front of us going “here fangirl, fangirls”, writers, and we will come a-running and a-panting with naughty thoughts.
There was an actual plot in the Tyler/Caroline/Matt parts of the episode, so let’s tackle that shall we?
So, last week Matt grew on me like E Coli on a piece of rancid meat with a side of rotten mashed potatoes (TM Price).
I really, truly didn’t want to let go of my new found appreciation for Matt. It was like growing as a recapper. But he pulled some shiz this week that was about as annoying as a werewolf humping your leg.
Therefore, I am going to hold a one-episode drinking game where you have to take a shot/swig every time Matt Donovan is a douche.
I guarantee you’ll be drunk as a skunk by the end of the recap.
It is only fitting really that I incorporate a drinking game into my recap of the episode where Aunt Jenna bites it, given she enjoyed a bit of sauce every now and then.
This week, Caroline and Matt face down a rabid Wolf!Tyler, but Matt turns out to be the real dog this episode.
When faced with the dramas of having a vampire girlfriend, Matt chooses himself, doing teen soap foremother Kelly Taylor proud. Beverly Hills 90210 is kind of like one of the founding families for Vampire Diaries, along with Buffy and Dawson’s Creek, dontcha think?
I learn that Caroline desperately needs a stint on Jerry Springer (episode entitled “Vampires And The Werewolves And Humans Who Love Them”) and have someone tell her, “drop that zero and get yourself a hero” because not only doesn’t she do the dumping in the Matt/Caro break up but she ISN’T REALLY THAT MAD that her mother and Matt were double crossing her.
Forwood unicorn stomper Jules bites the dust. Huzzah!
But we have to ask the question: does any of this really matter when Tyler gets to play couch commando?
I taught him everything he knows!
Here are all of the Tyler/Caroline scenes:
We open up with Wolf!Tyler gangsta-ing it up (TM Gen) and trying to chow down on Matt and Caroline.
Matt, who last episode somehow went from being Natefused to being able to take down an uber witch with a crack shot, FIRES AT WOLF!TYLER!
Take your first swig!
I know, I know, blah blah werewolf emergency blah.
I get that Tyler would probably rather die than put his friends in harm’s way.
But Matt didn’t seem conflicted in shooting Tyler AT ALL. I don’t care how scared he was, he knew that was his friend he was firing at.
When Caroline tells him to stop, Matt tellingly says “It’s trying to kill us”. He’s had difficulty reconciling Caroline the vampire with her remaining humanity, so it’s not surprising that he can’t accept Tyler as both wolf and man.
Credit where credit is due: the bullet DOES knock Wolf!Tyler out, giving Caroline and Tyler the chance to escape to the Lockwood mansion while Wolf!Tyler catches some Z’s.
Yup, that’s right, they hid from Tyler at TYLER’S HOUSE, admittedly the closest place to the cellar but also the first place Wolf!Tyler would likely go.
This is what happens when two blondes date you guys (says a blonde who knows). Really bad life/death decisions get made and unicorns get cock blocked.
Tehe! I got an email this week from a Spidey reader asking me what Matt is to Caro, if Tyler represents a unicorn to me. Stallion or mule, you decide.
Anyway, Matt does have some second thoughts about shooting at Tyler (too late bozo!) and asks, “You don’t think I killed him do you?” The fact that he shot not knowing whether or not it would be fatal for Tyler, without a second thought, is pretty gnarly to me.
Shot number two!
Prepare to take a double shot, because when Matt tells Caro about faking being compelled so that he could spy on her for her mom, Sheriff Forbes, he isn’t the slightest bit apologetic.
Far from that, he throws out the douchiest douche to ever douche lines.
Matt: “Your mom hates vampires. She grew up hating vampires. She’ll probably always hate vampires.”
Caroline: [in tiniest, saddest voice ever] Do you think my mom wants to kill me?
Matt: [disgust in tone] I don’t think your mom knows what to do about you.
Caroline: Well, I really don’t know what to do with me either.
Matt showed last week that he had accepted Caro isn’t a soulless monster just because she is a vampire, so way to go below the belt with these comments, Donovan. He could have given Caroline some reassurance, telling her that Sheriff Forbes had called Caroline “her baby” and found it tough to view her with the same hate she has grown up feeling for vampires. For a girl who is known for being insecure, feeding her obvious self-loathing about being a vampire by not giving her a crumb where her mother is concerned was just cruel.
Luckily, this awkward conversation is interrupted by a loud thump that marks the entrance of Naked!Tyler! Yippee!
Having a hot werewolf best friend is kind of like a lucky dip – only instead of never knowing what you’re gonna get, you never know when, and where, he’s gonna show up naked. Caroline seriously needs to get him a collar with a little bell on it for when he wolfs out.
OK, so that lucky dip analogy doesn’t really make much sense, but TYLER IS NAKED AS THE DAY HE WAS BORN AND STARTED GETTING RAISED BY WOLVES, YOU GUYS.
I may have wished for a second that Caroline was a transparent ghost rather than a badass vampire chick because she was totes blocking the view.
In a moment that has perfect symmetry to the “Caroline?” Tyler uttered in By The Light of the Full Moon, Tyler looks up and says her name in the dazed way a person might the morning after waking up from smokin’ hot baby were on baby vamp action.
Oh yeah, it should also be mentioned that Caro got Matt to shrug off his jacket so that she could cover the shivering Tyler up.
Matt’s reluctance to do so was his one major redeeming moment in this episode, because he was obviously thinking of us fangirls who were despondent at the thought of Naked!Tyler being covered up.
Caroline tucks Tyler up in bed and later talks to Matt, who dumps her because his human life is oh so hard and he can’t handle a vampire girlfriend and the baggage that comes attached. On the one hand, fair enough. On the other hand, within this episode alone I can think of people with much suckier lives to contend with. For example, Jenna learned she had transitioned into a vampire and was staked, Elena and Jeremy lost two more parental figures. Also, Matt complaining about an absentee mother when Caroline’s mom is contemplating murdering her daughter just made me go O_O
So all I have to say is CRY ME A MOTHERFUCKING RIVER, MATT DONOVAN about your hard life and kindly accept the tampons I throw in your general direction to wipe up the tears. They’re the super absorbent kind.
Despite finding out that Matt had been double crossing her with his mother and a complete lack of apology from him, Caroline is upset when he dumps her. Oh, c’mon BB! Playing tonsil hockey with Tyler would be so much better – he’s a three letter varsity athlete!
To be honest, I was disappointed she wasn’t more indignant about Matt’s betrayal. I can only rationalise that she was emotionally spent from worrying about Tyler and couldn’t muster up the energy to care. Ha!
Some of us like to eat Chunky Monkey ice cream when we’ve been dumped and need to wallow. On this show, Chunky Monkey comes attached to a naked man…
…so you just KNOW Caroline fossicking around and ate some ice cream while waiting for shirtless Tyler to wake up so that she could have the best of both worlds.
I love how Caroline just plops down HARD on the couch next to the sleepy Tyler, who is naked aside from a blanket. I’ll give you a moment to process that.
So, we know from the episode title that the sun rises. Does the blanket too, what with Caro being so close and all, and Coed Naked Forwood Cuddling (TM KJewls) going on? Oh please, like you weren’t all thinking that too 😉 Maybe we’ll find out in a similar scene in season three AKA The Year of Forwood and Delena, right Amy and KJewls?
Joey/Pacey fans know that’s when awesome dark horse ships happen on Kevin Williamson shows. (BTW, don’t miss KJewl’s awesome take on this episode). I am expecting no less than hot Tyler/Caroline sex, is all I’m sayin’.
Remember the days when Caroline got flustered at the mere sight of Tyler’s bare chest? Ah, the innocence of youth!
The line “you’re not gonna get naked, are you?” before Tyler’s transformation was definitely foreshadowing for a relationship that is sure to be filled with post-wolfing-out nekkidness.
Caroline, having seen Tyler’s junk a couple of times by now, and having shared emotionally intimate experiences with him, is refreshingly unfazed by cuddling underneath the blanket with him. Plus, for all the UST and eye-sexing that has been happening between the pair of late, this scene wasn’t played to be sexual or even flirty – it was just about one friend comforting the other.
Caroline: Hey. [Tyler groans in pain] Oh, yeah, you got shot. It’s healing.
We get a great example of what a Tyler sex face would look like.
Tyler: You were right. I shouldn’t have come home.
Caroline: No, you just should’ve never left. And you shouldn’t leave again.
I liked having Tyler say that line from last week with a different spin but from an equal place of concern as Caroline. When Caroline told Tyler he shouldn’t have come home, it was because she realised they were going to be used as part of the sacrifice ritual. Here, Tyler is clearly regretting coming close to hurting the girl he loves.
Tyler: You’re kidding, right? This is the second time I’ve tried to kill you.
Caroline: Well, no friendship is perfect.
Tyler’s laugh here was so free and un-selfconscious I was completely taken aback. The only other time I can recall Tyler laughing without any sense of irony, sarcasm or contempt was when he was talking post-transformation with Caroline in The Descent. It is just beautiful watching him light up around her, as she does with him.
Caroline: Matt broke up with me.
Tyler: I’m sorry.
Tyler, to his credit, does look genuinely sad for his friend, but you can see a definite internal struggle on his face not to feel happy that his rival for Caroline’s affections is out of the picture.
Also, having Caro so close, I bet his inner soundtrack was along these lines:
My goodies, my goodies…
He’s only a werewolf, after all.
Now, some people have asked why Caroline is more concerned about her boy troubles than her friends potentially getting sacrificed at that exact moment. The way I see it, in the tomb Tyler and Caroline thought that they were going to be Klaus’ sacrifices and didn’t realise that Klaus had a back up wolf and vampire. Given that Tyler wolfed out before Caroline and Matt could touch base with the rest of the group, Tyler and Caro are probably oblivious to the fact that the sacrifice still went ahead. Also, for most of the night Matt and Caro had to lock themselves inside so that they wouldn’t become Tyler!Wolf chow, and Tyler needed someone to look out for him once he’d morphed back into being a human.
Having said that, it would have been nice if they writers could have had Caroline try to call Bonnie or Elena or something, and express concern about only reaching their voicemail.
Caroline: Yeah, well, you know, instead of just bailing on me again, you could just say ‘thank you Caroline, for taking care of me’. And, ‘I’m sorry that I tried to chow down on you again’.
Candice Accola knocked it out of the park when she went from her cute laugh to dissolving into tears about Matt. The fact that Caro and Tyler can slip between laughter and seriousness shows how much they just “get” each other.
Caro has been the emotionally dominant one in the relationship, in the sense that previously the dynamic was her comforting the scared Tyler as he prepared for his first transformation. It was nice seeing her be so vulnerable with him for a change.
Tyler: Hey, hey. C’mere. Easy. Thank you Caroline, for taking care of me.
Caroline: You’re welcome.
One of Caroline’s key neuroses is her control freakiness and attempt to script and plan every part of her life. Unlike Matt, Tyler seems to find this endearing and responds in a positive way, by giving her what she needs – in this case, the exact words she needs to hear. Contrast this with vintage Matt lines like, “I told you how I feel about you Caroline, what more do you need?” Based on his past reactions to Caroline’s “neuroticness”, Matt would find Caroline giving him this little direction annoying, whereas Tyler not only repeats her words but says them with such appreciation and adoration that they sound like his own.
Isn’t it just satisfying that Matt’s douchery LITERALLY pushed her into Tyler’s super buff, super shiny arms?
All this left me screaming at the screen, “Just have baby Klauses already, you guys!”
Which is a neat segue to me officially joining Team Klaus because he de-hearts Jules as part of the sacrifice this ep. So long, Forwood unicorn stomper!
Jules claims before she dies that she just didn’t want Tyler to be alone, to which Gen from txgirl0302 tumblr so rightly said, “He wasn’t alone, he had Caroline, bitch!”
Now, 12_12_12 raised the interesting point that Caroline probably is oblivious to Tyler’s feelings because he hasn’t made a move on her since The Kiss, and has more than likely overanalysed the situation as in her typical Caroline way and written it off as an impulsive moment that resulted from him feeling needy after his transformation.
I wonder, how do you think Tyler thinks Caro feels about their kiss? I mean, she responded to him, but then slammed a door into his face. Do you think he just thought she got caught up in the moment of it all, or knows she is denying her feelings to herself? Or that feelings were there but have now simmered down to friendship after all that has happened since?
Matt has walked away from his friends for the time being because he can’t handle their supernatural baggage. Do you think that he will re-think this decision next season? Or do you think this was the first step in Matt potentially going dark and working against them in the future?
Update: I was hoping for some fanfiction that kicks off from the Coed Naked Forwood Cuddling Couch scene. Boy, do T/C fans work fast! A new fic from Susan at A Heart of Glass called I Didn’t Have to Lie to You When the Daylight Came is amazing and well worth a read!