Do you remember the moment that you became a crazed Vampire Diaries fan? I’d love to know what it was in the comments!
Mine? The vampire gone wild scene of Damon and Vicki dancing around La Casa de Rich and Awesome (TM KJewls) to the song Enjoy The Silence, after taking hits of one another’s blood. It was sexy and hilarious and just looked like so much damn fun!
Hugh Hefner, the Playboy founder who bedded many of his own magazines’ centrefolds, gave a simple answer when asked what his best pick-up line is.
“Hi, my name is Hugh Hefner.”
Now, we know Stefan loves eating bunnies, both the Thumper kind and apparently even the Playboy kind, back in the day (He tells Elena before their ill-fated double date with Care and Matt about the OTHER double date he’d been on: “’72 Hef and the twins. I got Miss June.” LOVE!)
But when it comes to TVD fandom as a whole, the vamp with the power to drop the panties of most women with the simple recitation of his name is Mr Damon Salvatore. Heck, he even comes attached to the ultimate set of bedroom eyes.
So, strip down to your pink panties if you’re a fangirl or rip open your shirt if you’re a fanboi. It is finally time to dance our hearts out to an in-depth Damon mixtape.
Regular Spidey readers will know the unsung hero (you see what I did there ;)) of this blog is Mr Brandon Flowers of The Killers, who I was introduced to by blogger pal Amy from Imaginary Men and promptly anointed Music Sex God.
Because… have you looked at this man? That is not an ordinary mortal, I tell you!
One day I will do a proper music mixtape appreciating the amazing considerable vocal and songwriting talents of this man. But first, he is deserving of his own unique greatest hits mixtape – one made up of the hottest pictures of his that have graced my vision.
I guarantee you will become like a crack addict, and highly recommend that you visit Amy’s Flowers Fridays for your weekly fix. This girl has been feeding my habit with random Facebook pic postings too, because she is just that. damn. awesome!
I love screen caps that capture inexplicable facial expressions!
So, in the immortal words of Pacey Witter, is it any wonder that I have fallen 100 per cent ass backwards in love with Tyler Lockwood (Michael Trevino) of The Vampire Diaries?
The countdown has begun for Usher’s OMG Tour in Australia, and I recently picked up my tickets for the event and got to gaze at them with awe-struck wonder.
Currently, these tickets sit in a crystal vault, with a disco ball revolving above it. And with angels playing harps nearby. That is how much I dig Usher.
There are three songs of his that hold a particularly special place in my heart. I don’t think I shock anyone when I say that the letter “U” is involved in all of their titles.
Depending on my mood, the Twilight series is one of two things…
1) The worst fiction to ever be printed on poor, innocent, defenceless ex-trees.
2) Literary crack fiction of the highest order that deserves its own book shelf, complete with revolving disco ball, rainbow sparkles and unicorns trotting around. (Yes, I’m aware that I constantly refer to unicorns when describing my obsessions; Veronica Mars fans will understand).
To give you an example of my schizophrenic taste in things, here are my two favourite Y2K songs:
I stand by the latter without any shame 😉
So, anyway, I re-read the first Twilight book for this mixtape post, dutifully recording thoughts in my trusty notebook along the way.
These notes started off as an honest attempt to do an in-depth analysis of their character dynamics, but quickly devolved into this…
P37 His hair was dripping wet, dishevelled – even so he looked like he’d just finished shooting a commercial for hair gel. His dazzling face was friendly, open, a slight smile on his flawless lips.
Seriously SMeyer, just f**k your own literary creation already and get it over with, kthnxbye. Also, dazzling. And what exactly do flawless lips look like anyway??
P192 The overpowering craving to touch him also refused to fade, and I crushed my fists safely against my ribs until my fingers were aching with the effort.
JUST F**KING TOUCH HIM ALREADY BELLA! Who cares if he treated you like you had an airborne contagion before?
P220 I knew I was far too stressed to sleep, so I did something I’d never done before. I deliberately took unnecessary cold medicine – the kind that knocked me out for a good eight hours.
Haha! Gratuitious drug use in a Mormon Vampire Bible. Love it!
P233 “It’s twilight,” Edward murmured, looking at the western horizon, obscured as it was with clouds. His voice was thoughtful, as if his mind were somewhere far away. I stared at him as he gazed unseeingly out the windshield. I was still staring when his eyes suddenly shifted back to mine.
“It’s the safest time of the day for us,” he said, answering the unspoken question in my eyes. “The easiest time. But also the saddest, in a way…the end of another day, the return of the night. Darkness is so predictable, don’t you think?” He smiled wistfully.
*Spidey aneurism* You so deep, SMeyer.
Right around the part where Edward gives Bella a kiss that LITERALLY STOPS HER HEART, it started becoming impossible to form coherent thoughts.
It was at this point I realised that Twilight Mood #1 had me firmly in its grasp, and when it came to writing this mixtape I was in more trouble than a pregnant nun.
All I could think of was writing a mixtape of the most jaw-droppingly, batshit insane themes/moments of the first Twilight book.
If there ever was a vampire that could be considered sparkly on The Vampire Diaries, it would be Caroline Forbes.
She floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee. She looks cute and innocent, and says stuff like “You suck!” to her vampire maker Damon Salvatore with absolutely no sense of irony. Her bubbly, peppy personality has even earned her the nickname of Vampire Barbie.
But just ask Mason and Tyler how lethal and kickass she can be.
And her care for Tyler during the worst night of his life, his long, painful, drawn out werewolf transformation, points to an inner strength that is at odds with her Goldilocks exterior.
So this mixtape is dedicated to the wannabe Alpha Girl who eventually became the type of person the Alpha Wolf would cling to in his darkest hour.